Last year was pretty big for us. Aside from Covid and the absolute **shit fight** chaos that caused, we had some other changes happening inside our family . We had noticed that the behaviour of Miss 6 and Mr 4 had begun to escalate - in different ways - which is fun. We had been ticking along for a while, tackling our usual family fight club, making scenes basically every time we left the house (who’s with me 🙌) but I started noticing that things were getting INTENSE. More intense than they had previously been. Let’s start with Miss 6. There has always been a “Love/Strongly Dislike” dynamic between Miss 6 and her 4yo twin siblings. She finds them difficult and unpredictable - they are sensory seekers, she is a sensory avoider. Miss 4 has found her voice and autonomy (read: she will cut you) and Mr. 4 is a bundle of ADHD energy that never EVER stops. Put this together and you can probably imagine what our house is like, I genuinely worry that our neighbours think I’m smacking the kids. What is actually happening is that someone said “It’s called Toy Story” and someone else said “NO! It’s called Toy Stories”… from there it becomes a scene out of Fight Club. The first rule of Fight Club is you don’t talk about Fight Club… except all three literally never EVER stop talking. So Miss 6 finds this all too much. She needs control in order to feel calm, and this house is anything but controllable. Her anxiety around what is coming next or what may happen had grown to the point that the twins couldn’t even speak without getting a clip over the ear. They couldn’t approach me for a cuddle or sit on my lap because Miss 6 felt they were impinging on her property i.e. ME. Now we come to Mr. 4 - the love bug, the early riser, the climber. He approaches life with love and vigour, energy and screaming. He can’t stop himself from antagonising his sisters, even when he knows the consequence will be swift and severe (dealt out by the girls). He needs constant interaction, physically and mentally and he will do whatever is required to get it. Let me be clear - he is a LOVE BUG. This guy is the sweetest little hugger on the face of the earth and as such, people fall in love with him constantly, his kindy teachers want to take him home (which is tempting at times). When Mr. Love Bug decided to scale the fence at kindy which had a very large drop on the other side, we knew it was time to see the paediatrician. The kindy director was in shock - in 12 years no child had made a serious attempt to climb or had possessed the strength and dexterity required to be successful - until now. We booked our appointment with our paediatrician and discussed our concerns with her. She said “you guys have persisted for a long time. You’ve really tried a lot of things. I would like to think about some medication - I think it’s time. What do you think?” What did we think? YES. We had thought, discussed and wondered about medication for a long time. We waited and persisted, talked, tried and supported but nothing really made much difference. Probably like all parents, we would prefer that our kids didn’t require medication, but like ALL parents we want what is best for our kids. We want to give them every chance to have the most fulfilling life they possibly can - if that means balancing their brain chemistry with daily medication then so be it. Did we notice a difference? Yes. Has it been worth it? Yes.
Mr. Love Bug can now join in at kindy, he can sit on the mat, sometimes interact in a positive way. There is still a long way to go for him, he starts prep next year and he is undertaking some pretty intensive therapy to get him there. The medication has helped to calm his body and mind - at night he isn’t saying “my brain won’t be quiet, I can’t keep my legs still”. He’s been able to express his personality more and it’s just as beautiful as he is. Miss 6’s anxiety has settled down a bit - maybe 25% less if I had to put a number on it. That has allowed her some space in her mind to pause sometimes, not ALWAYS lead with her hands, have some positive play with her siblings. She understands that her medicine is to help her brain to feel bit calmer and give her some more thinking space. She can focus more on the things she loves like art and bike riding. Make no mistake - our house is still a loud and chaotic place but there is slightly more laughing and slightly less crying in 2022 - for now, that’s enough for me. *** This is an anecdotal story from my own family. I do not advocate for medicating kids. I do not advocate against medicating kids. I recommend that everyone consult their allied health and medical professional teams when making decisions for their children *** If you would like to have a chat about how Sunshine Family Support can help - or if you would just like to have a general chat - give me a call : 1300 56 52 52 Cheers Kim
Sunshine Family Support can help match a Support Worker to your family https://www.facebook.com/SunshineFamilySupport Our Sensory Space run various workshops and parent/carer events https://www.facebook.com/oursensoryspace The Maleny Sitting Room hold regular events for parents and carers to connect and access information https://www.facebook.com/thesittingroommaleny/
Steps Autism Treehouse can provide links to the community and advice on services https://www.facebook.com/STEPSAutismTreehouse/ Lifeline 13 11 14 https://www.facebook.com/LifelineAustralia/ Beyond Blue 1300 22 4636 https://www.facebook.com/beyondblue/
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